Thursday, December 20, 2012

'Twas the Nightmare Before Christmas (Disaster Restoration Remix)

'Twas the Nightmare Before Christmas 
(Disaster Restoration Remix)



'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house
Not a faucet was dripping, not unlike a drought.
The stockings were hung by the lit chimney, with little care,
In hopes that no disaster would soon be there.

The children were nestled all snug in their beds, 
while NO visions of water damages danced in their heads.
And mamma in her 'kerchief, and I in my cap,
were by no means ready to deal with a big mishap.

When down through the ceiling there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the bed to see what had shattered.
Away to the living room I flew very fast,
And just as I arrived there appeared a bright flash.

The flames creeping from the fireplace aglow
gave lustre to a fat man who lay still on the floor.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a hole through my roof and a whole lotta water.

With a little pungent smell, so musty and thick,
I knew in a moment and suddenly felt sick.
I recalled a rainstorm last June or July,
and I hadn't fixed my roof. Why, oh why?!

The possibilites rattled off, a list in my head,
mold, mildew, asbestos, and lead!
By the time I had finished I suddenly felt hot,
but when I turned around I was in shock!

The fat man lay there, still on the ground,
while I yelled, "Hey Santa, quit foolin around!"
I pulled him away from the small dancing flames,
which had creeped past the fireplace's worthless safety gate.

I flew to the kitchen to grab some cold water,
to give the small fire a bit of a shower.
I heard Santa grunt as he began to come-to,
as I extinguished the last flame leading up to the flue.

Santa stood up and observed his surroundings,
while I panted behind him on the verge of bawling.
A hole in the roof and ceiling alike,
with water and snow around the tree like a dike.

Smoke residue scattered on the walls and above,
with charred carpeting below, that will no doubt, get the shove.
And although the moldy smell is covered by smoke,
to think that its' danger is belittled, would be a bad joke.

I glanced back at Santa with tears in my eyes,
pleading that some Christmas magic could fix all awry.
He bowed his head, humbly and sincere,
gave his head a small shake and let go of one tear.

I fell to my knees, defeated and tired,
and imagined my family awakening to what had transpired.
Christmas was no doubt, in my mind ruined,
I'll be talking with my insurance agent, Robert VanLuen.

Before I had even noticed he'd departed,
Santa re-entered the room, seemingly light-hearted.
I scoffed at his nature and found it quite rude,
but what he said next had me subdued.

"I've called in the experts," he declared with a rumble,
"They work with your insurance, and are rather quite humble."
"A crew will arrive in a bright green box truck,
and with a wave of a wand will change all your luck."

Before I knew it there was a knock at my door,
and here these men were, to do this chore.
I signed some paperwork and they were ready to go,
they said they'd get it back to the way it was so long ago.

They left some air movers and a dehu or two,
and said it should be dry by the time Christmas was through.
They documented readings so they could be sure,
and asked when they could return to monitor.

Then they sprang to their truck and gave a quick wave,
And away they all flew, heroes all the same.
But I heard one exclaim, 'ere he drove out of sight,
"Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!"


At Servpro we know disasters can happen at the most inopportune times! That's why we're there for you 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year! And yes, that includes the Holidays!! We hope we don't hear from you, but if we do, we'll have you back to enjoying fruitcake, egg nog, and long-distanced relatives in no time!
If you need a hero come Christmas, call Servpro of Bountiful at 801-298-4272.
Where we're "Faster to any size disaster!"

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